Sunday, 19 January 2014


Do you make wishes?

Oh, yes, I am definitely guilty of this. And why do I feel guilty? "Thou shalt not covet." Was that drummed into your psyche too?

Do you save the wishbone of the chicken and pull it with a friend? For years I saved those wishbones for the fun of making a wish. I lined them up along the kitchen window sill. My family laughed at that. In the end I stopped buying whole chickens and threw all the saved wishbones in the bin. There was no fun for me in this type of wishing.

Do you wish when you blow out birthday candles?

Do you wish to win prizes? Do you buy raffle tickets because of the prize rather than to support an organisation? I admit I have done this.

Do you buy TattsLotto tickets and mentally plan how you will live with the prize money? I do sometimes. My husband never buys any raffle tickets because he sees it as gambling. No Lotto tickets or Scratchies for him.

Will I wish for world peace? No. That is definitely a waste of effort. There will always be conflict of some type. Peaceful and harmonious coexistence is something to aim for but ultimately unattainable worldwide. I could wish for some peace on a smaller scale, but I think it is a level of dissent which causes society to strive for justice.

Will I wish for beauty? No, that is pointless as nobody would know me then. I am imperfect and interesting, not beautiful. Maybe I could wish to apply myself more diligently to staying healthy though. And improve my grooming a bit. I could wish to develop a good working relationship with a hairdresser.

Will I wish for more money? Yes, I think so; a good idea. Now, how much? Enough to live comfortably, but not ostentatiously. Enough to have a new car, a truly new car not just a different one. Enough for the fuel, insurance, registration, maintenance and servicing for that car. Enough for a trip each year to somewhere interesting. Enough to give my children a home each. I would need an accountant to help me deal with all that money. I would need to win TattsLotto. Maybe it is simpler to be less wealthy. Maybe those homeless people on the streets have mastered that wish already.

What does this teach? Greed? Kindness? Appreciation?
What about the way we wish for gifts at Christmas time or for birthdays? As a child I received one gift from Santa Claus and one gift from my parents. It was dependent on good behaviour as well. Now children compose long lists of what they want, wish for, or expect as gifts. There are no connections to behaviour. People are asked to donate gifts so less fortunate children may receive more gifts. I recognise that it is about kindness towards others but is this also wishing gone mad? Does this encourage greed? Do I want to be part of that? No. I will not wish for gifts. I will not encourage others to wish for gifts either. A Christmas or birthday gift is a bonus and should not be a requirement. It really is the thought that counts. Perhaps I should wish to be less sanctimonious about this????

But wishes can mean different things to different people. For some it means your directions when you are unable to look after yourself any more. Like a letter accompanying your will. Is it my wish to be kept on life support for years? Do I wish for a fancy funeral? Do I wish my organs to be donated? I have already made my expectations plain to my family. For me these are not wishes, but more like demands or edicts.

I definitely wish for more strength of character. For backbone, not wishbone. For effort not greed.

I wish that my family members and friends would have less adversity and more joy.

I wish to be honest, thoughtful, appreciative, and to show kindness.

I wish to be useful not decorative, although a combination of the two would be rather nice.

I wish for my life to be respected even after my death.

I wish for the ability to see options and choices rather than to feel defeated.

Wishes are rather like goals without the stuffing, aren't they? We can wish without accountability. There is no blame when the wishes do not come true. What are you wishing for your life?

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