Wednesday, 27 January 2016


My niece sent me these alternate meanings of common words.
I particularly like the meaning of coffee and assume coffer also applies.

Coffee (n.) The person upon whom one coughs.
Flabbergasted (adj.) Appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained.
Abdicate (v.) To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
Esplanade (v.) To attempt an explanation while drunk.
Lymph (v.) To walk with a lisp.
Gargoyle (n.) Olive-flavoured mouthwash.
Flatulence (n.) Emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over by a steamroller.
Balderdash (n.) A rapidly receding hairline.

Testicle (n.) A humorous question on an exam.

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